WTF McCain's Corky Impersonations

Granted I am no McCain fan but even his most die hard followers have to do a WTF at his apparent penchant for sticking his tongue out. I've seen less tongue hanging on a Saint Bernard after a hard run.






Looking at these pictures, I am suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to find a photo of the latest Palin offspring....





I just want someone in office who will say, look we've got to focus on ourselves for a while. Let's be like Sweden. Let's mind our own fucking business and clean up our own mess here at home, rather than get our knickers in a twist all over the damn globe. Iran? Iraq? North Korea? Fuck 'em. Let those living next to them worry about them for a while. We have our own mess here on the homefront. We got illegals streaming in like it's happy hour at IHop, we got meth on every damn corner, people are losing their jobs right and left while big execs get 45 million dollar severance packages, our kids can't string a fucking paragraph together and think handing out blowjobs on the school bus at 14 is acceptable. No one can afford insurance and no one cares if we get sick, unless of course we've got 4 kids by 3 guys and no job, and that's not fucking right. I want someone who can say, I don't care if you own a gun for self defense or choose not to have a child you know you won't take care of anyway. Someone who can say, let's treat each other like adults for a change, instead of a bunch of homeroom mommies trying to make everyone else on the playground mind us. And preferably, I want someone who can say it without his tongue slapping him on the collarbone.

Dow Panic Will Make Me Rich

Week after week, the stock market is all over the chart. Americans who are only familiar with getting rich in the short term have lost their minds and sold off tons of stock thinking they'll avert a personal financial disaster. I say, keep selling fools. Your panic is causing stocks to drop to lows I've not seen in years, and while you're screaming SELL SELL SELL, I'm burning up the keyboard buying shares for half what they traded for this time last year. Color me Kennedy, cashing in during a crisis, but I prefer to be able to afford to dine on the better quality cat food in my old age, vs that mouse in a can crap, and the way my portfolio is swelling it's looking like Fancy Feast may be on the menu.

I'm holding out buying on one particular energy company, hoping it will drop just a *little* bit lower than it's current $11 a share. It was at $44 before all this panic at the disco ensued, so I suppose I should not be greedy and just snatch it up now. The Asian markets are taking a tumble as well, so I've quadrupled my stock in a Hong Kong based semiconductor manufacturer for what my original handful of stocks cost me back in the spring. I was going to buy into Game Stop, after their stocks dropped from $44 to $21 but I waited too long and they rebounded to $32. I bet they'll drop again though, and that stock should be trading around $66, so it's well worth the price.

Oh my freakin golden god

In what I suspect was a drug induced stupor, a UK artist felt the burning need to deify our most famous example of anorexia and cocaine addiction with a statue made of gold. Contorted into a yoga pose that I doubt she could pull off even if she were flying on an 8 ball of heroin, Kate Moss is now immortalized yet again, just in case the 235,892 newspaper, magazine, and online articles didn't succeed in searing her image and arrest record into your brain. The artist, a Mr Marc Quinn, stated "For Kate, she thinks it lifts into her into a mythical level." I don't know about that, but I am sure she was awestruck at the prospect of all the coke that gold could buy.

Mr Quinn was also quoted as saying "If there was a war or anarchy this will be melted down and turned into bullion..."

One can only hope.