Dog training

I went to a friend's house today and was treated to a good 10 minutes of their dog jumping all over me and howling like an idiot. This ALWAYS happens if I go over there. I hate going over there. I hate being jumped on and barked on. I have one thing to say to people who have dogs that jump all over people.

Even an idiot can teach a dog to stop jumping.

Dogs do every single thing that they do in their lives for a reason. Their reasons may make no sense to us, but it does to the dog. The dog jumps on me because he wants attention. He does not reason to himself, she is yelling at me and shoving me so I should stop. The dog is not that smart. Instead, he thinks SHE TOUCHED ME SHE SPEAKS TO ME YAY!!!

There is a common school of thought that says to step on the dog's toes when he jumps on you. It works, to an extent, but only because you are causing the dog to associate jumping on you with pain. It will not work when the dog decides he will accept pain in order to get your attention, and believe me many dogs will accept pain in their efforts to get what they want. Just watch some dog being choked to death as he drags his owner down the road. He can't breathe, but he doesn't care because he's doing what he wants to do.

Then how do I teach my dog to stop jumping, you ask me. Well I am going to tell you. It's extremely simple, but requires patience and restraint on your part. Can you do it? Well, unless you're an idiot, you can.

Ignore him.

That's right, ignore him. When you come home and your dog loses his shit and jumps all over you barking and licking and acting like he is demon possessed, stop what you are doing, cross your arms, do NOT engage in eye contact with him, and keep your mouth shut. Let him jump. Let him bark. Let him act like an idiot while you act like a statue. Don't scold him. Don't touch him. For godssake don't try to step on his feet.

At some point, and it may take 10 minutes, that dog is going to realize he's not getting anywhere with you. He's going to be confused, and at that moment he's going to stop acting the fool and just stand there staring at you in confusion. If you're lucky, he may even sit down. When this happens, break your statue impersonation and praise and pet him. If he starts to go all stupid again, resume the Michaelangelo pose and hold it until he goes back to silent confusion again.

This concept is known as Learn to Earn. Your dog must earn your attention and praise. He can't demand it by acting like a dumbass. It will take time, but a lot less than you think. I have broken hardcore jumpers of that annoying ass habit in a couple of days with this method. Your dog WILL figure it out, and believe me once a dog learns what to do to gain attention, he will do it every single time. It is your job to ensure that what he learns to do is something that makes him a joy to be around, and not a royal pain in the ass.

My final comment on this is that using pain as a training tool is just a piss poor way of training any animal. The easiest way to train any animal is to put them in a position where the right choice is also the most pleasurable one, rather than the least painful option. I could train my friend's dog to stop jumping, but since none of the other family members will follow through, it's pointless. So, they continue thinking their dog is a hyper shit, when all the while they themselves taught him to act that way.

On a separate note I dropped off Jack & Diesel at the clinic for shots and grooming and OMG I'm so embarrassed at how nasty Jack was. His coat matts up, that Kommodor in him really makes it ugly, and I had no idea how many ticks he'd picked up under there. Frontline says it's good for a month but it's really only effective for about 3 weeks, and he is overdue by about a month so ugh. So embarrassed.